I think that when someone leaves a church over disagreements, you can’t expect “good terms” to mean that the relationships will continue as they always have. There will undoubtedly be fallout. But I do think it’s important to try to leave in a way where both parties still respect each other as decent, human beings even in the midst of disagreement. That being said, you do all you can, but you can’t control the other party.

I think the problem is magnified when the disagreement is over issues that don’t deal with disagreements over interpretation of the Bible, but instead deal with whether the Bible should be our final authority on the Christian life and what it says about Jesus being the only way for salvation. If a church refuses to teach these things (but isn’t teaching the congregation otherwise), it may very well be that the people are generally “safe,” but I would be worried to death that many there would not be.

This might mean that in some (maybe many) situations, it is not necessary or helpful to speak out in opposition. But when it comes to the most important issues, you do need to speak up and take your stand.

I would also present a counterargument to the idea that the people at this church are generally safe. They may be, but there is also the danger that the church’s silence on the central Gospel message, along with their refusal to address major cultural issues facing our society today, can gradually influence the congregation without their even being aware of it until they perhaps no longer find the Gospel as important as they once did, and because Scripture is no longer emphasized in the church, it is no longer emphasized in the congregational people’s own lives as well. Isn’t this very dangerous? Maybe even more so because the people aren’t aware of it to begin with? They don’t even know they are treading dangerous waters.

I guess my point is that a church can be harmful not only by what it teaches but also by what it refuses to teach.

As far as what the Bible says about it, I’m not really sure, either, but I can’t really think of any time when the Bible provides the model of causing a lot of drama over something. I think it’s somewhat destructive to go around spreading information about what’s wrong with a particular church fellowship, especially because, in our case, we are leaving a place that is still doing good work for a fair number of people.

I’ve also been asking a lot of questions about church practices in general, and for the time being we are involved with a home church community. I think the overall model of the church in the U.S. is pretty flawed.